It all started with the day I stepped into this campus gate with my parents to get the application form for the M. A. Psychology course. Did I know it would turn up like this? No…. Not at all…
Kariavattom Campus... well, the first day here was great… A really motivated girl, full of dreams about her future, her destiny… She wanted so many things to happen in her life. She wanted to ‘learn’ how to be a prefect psychologist, she wanted to be the best at everything she puts her head into… In short, as every person in this campus, she also came with a hope that she would be “someone” once she finishes the course here.
Then one day, I came to join the Department of Psychology and also the University Hostel for Women, with a load of bags and suitcases, bed, buckets, everything… everyone kept staring at me, may be even thought “what a strange girl???”. My first few days in the department were scary. One doesn’t know what others expect of you, what one needs to do, and what is supposed to be done. The scary days passed and the boring days came in. There was nothing much to do in the department, actually… there was a lot to do but I did none. Tried reading books from the department library, but it would be closed whenever I felt like going in there and reading or should I say I felt like going in there whenever it was closed. The campus library was like a lullaby to me (it still is!!!) the moment I go in there, I sleep.
I agree that campus is a very beautiful place, with its trees, ‘Haimavathi Kulam’, and off course the Campus ‘Ooty’, but one cannot go to these places alone (well, it takes some time to make friends who would go out with you…). There were no shops or hotels nearby too…On top of every thing it was my first time in a hostel (you know how hostels are…). Liked the food and every thing, but got a bit home sick as we (Mom, Dad, & I) used to go out a lot when I was home. Then my only way out was to go to my Mom and Dad (who were at Kollam at that time). For weekends I would go to Kollam, every single weekend.
Days passed by, semester passed by… The first semester exams were taken very seriously, prepared for each for whole 2 days (that’s what I used to do). Assignments and seminars were prepared in an extensive way. Oh boy, was I motivated. Life moved on, the 2nd sem started and towards the middle along came the laziness, slowly, steadily, very determined… ‘Amotivation’, that’s what we, the psychology students, called it. Preparation for the exams started getting restricted to the day before the exam (motivation would come only then). Assignments and seminars were prepared in a day or two.
The social life was on full bloom. Got lots of friends (in the department as well as in other departments and the hostel) and had fun chatting, gossiping, with them on the divider. We went exploring into the ‘forests’ near the Environmental Science, Malayalam, and Politics departments whenever we got a chance. We had fun in the canteens, coffee from the store, demanding treats for every silly reason, at the occasional ‘gana mela’ and so on and so forth. I got to learn a lot about life from my friends and the friendships, from the teachers and staff in the department as well as in other offices.
Third semester also went on like this, full of fun, boredom, excitement, laziness, etc., etc… Trips to home were reduced drastically (mainly because Dad got transferred to Kanhangad). I started enjoying the campus life to a certain extent. Towards the middle of the 4th sem it suddenly struck me… The Dissertation. Where did all the motivation that I came here with go? What happened to that girl’s hopes and dreams?
It is not my story alone. It is felt by most of us in the department and (I’m sure) by students in other departments as well. Many have told me that they had so many expectations about this campus, that they will get the best training here in their respective subjects, that they will be busy all the time with their work, that they will not be able to get any free time to enjoy themselves, etc. But we have seen that this, to a certain extent, is not true. We do have lots of free time to enjoy ourselves; we are not at all busy with our work all the time (even when we should be…). Ok, so we do get the best facilities (experts in the field-the faculty, library, etc) here, but do we utilize it? No, most of us don’t.
It is said that “Once a person joins the Kariavattom Campus, he/she either finds ‘life’ or gets a Ph. D” and most of the time its true too. One either falls in love with someone here and gets married or studies really hard and gets a Ph. D. As far as I can see the most brilliant, the most talented people, with great potentials come here. Then why is it that many feel ‘amotivated’? What is the reason for the laziness that is felt to be induced into us? It is true that most of the students who passed out from here are in very good positions, but did they feel ‘amotivated’ too when they were here? Do students in other universities feel the same way during there 2nd and 3rd semesters? If all Post Graduate students felt the same, has it got something to do with their age? So many questions… no answers yet…
Hey! I could do my dissertation on that!!! Well, too late…
